Massage parlor holds last-minute mandatory meeting from 7-9 PM forcing worker to skip their fiancé's birthday: 'I don't do meetings outside of work hours. End of.'

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JR Atkinson • Writer and Editor
Aug 13, 2025 10:00 PM EDT

Sometimes you make plans so far in advance that you can't believe the day will ever actually come. I remember feeling that way when I was starting high school, about graduation as a senior. It's so impossible to fathom because it feels so far away. "I'll be a completely different person by then," you think, and you'd be right. You undergo so much change in that timespan. But that's 4 years. What about 3 months? That's enough time to reorganize your life around, but not enough time to sweat about the future. It is certainly enough of a heads-up to give your boss about a prior commitment. 

But bosses don't always think that way. They don't always heed your advance requests for time off. They would much rather fly by the seat of their pants and spring anything on you at the last minute. It doesn't matter if you're celebrating a birthday or burying your beloved hermit crab. No, if a meeting needs to happen right now, it needs to happen right now, apparently. That's the situation one worker recently found themselves in when their fiancé's birthday was coming up.

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  • A woman with dark hair explains something to another woman.
    via Unsplash+ (A. C.)

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • When they thought they were just sending a heads-up text letting their boss know they would be absent from a meeting, they didn't realize that there would be instant pushback. It soon became clear that their boss had different priorities. Read on for the story. 

  • No, you can't have off your fiancé's birthday, that you scheduled months in advance.

    Actual details are a bit too long to type in the title. I was an assistant manager at a massage place (legit). Our business closed at 6pm on Sundays. So starting at 7pm, I had booked a few things for us to do all night. Didn't even check with work as it was after hours. My fiance was excited about everything.
    via u/PhoenixApok
  • About three weeks before the date, our company scheduled a mandatory meeting that night from 7 to 9. My plans were booked like 3 months in advance. Thing was...we had a zero tolerance policy on missing meetings. This part I kind of understood. So many people missed meetings, some that were actually important, that our company said that barring medical issues or approval from the owner, it was auto termination if you missed.
    via u/PhoenixApok
  • So I naturally texted the owner (who had met my fiance) and explained my issue. I thought it was a courtesy. Nope. They replied with "Yeah, I understand that but I really think you need to be at this one, as an example of loyalty to the company. If you don't show, what will others think?" Maybe that I have a LIFE?
    via u/PhoenixApok
  • Long story short, I had to cancel plans. We couldn't afford me to be out of work. I never gave more than 30% to that job after that. Edit. To be clear I didnt ask for PTO because we only had like 2 Sunday night meetings a year. Didn't occur to me to ask for time off for a time we are almost always closed
    via u/PhoenixApok
  • Two women hear something explained by their boss.
    via Unsplash+ (A. C.)

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • Commenters agreed that this situation was ridiculous.

    AMonkeyAndALava... 19h ago . If the company expects 100% availability they should schedule meetings during working hours. Hope you are at least getting some sweet overtime for working until 9pm on a Sunday.
    via u/AMonkeyAndALavaLamp
  • PhoenixApok OP • 19h ago I mean it was paid, and my fiance understood. But the thing that really pred me off was my fiance and I had previously had dinner with the owner and his wife. He was always talking about "work life balance" and such....
    via u/PhoenixApok
  • JustmyOpinion444 • 18h ago . The owner means HIS work and life, balanced to HIS liking. I don't do meetings outside of work hours. End of.
    via u/JustmyOpinion444
  • Lars_loves_Comm... . 18h ago I don't get the auto termination for one missed meeting. Do you really want to fire people automatically for one offense, no second chance? And what happens when a manager skips a meeting? Auto terminate as well?
    via u/Lars_loves_Community
  • • shinygoldhelmet ⚫ 13h ago Probably because they schedule meetinga at stupid-a times like 7pm on a Sunday and no one wants to be there, and they chose violence and control instead of giving people the desire path they want.
    via u/shinygoldhelmet
  • PhoenixApok OP · 18h ago . Honestly it did make sense. What happened was we would have a meeting on some new technique, policy, or occasionally even law. 60% of people would show. They would see that the 40% that skipped were not reprimanded. So the next meeting 50% would show. Etc.
    via u/PhoenixApok
  • Now yes, like almost all businesses, 80% of these meetings could have been emails. But some were necessary (the one in my post was NOT) It did s k because at a different meeting, one of our...not top guys but definitely in the top 30% completely overslept. He texted us in a panic 15 minutes after the meeting ended. I had to fire him. Owner said if he let this one slide, next meeting it would be immediately back to the problem.
    via u/PhoenixApok
  • boywithflippers • 19h ago Yeah, most companies don't care about "loyalty" so why should you? I'd keep pushing the issue.
    via u/boywithflippers
  • kikazztknmz · 16h ago • Me 10 years ago would have cancelled my plans too. Me now would have simply said, "I'm sorry, but I have a prior engagement and can't make it". If they press for why, "I don't feel comfortable sharing personal medical info".
    via u/kikazztknmz
  • PhoenixApok OP • 16h ago Thing was, I was 100% sure my boss was gonna let me off when I reminded him it was my fiances birthday. We were friends. It didnt even occur to me he would say no.
    via u/PhoenixApok
  • kikazztknmz • 15h ago Ugh, that s ks. Blows my mind that they'd require people to me at a mandatory meeting on a Sunday night and think everyone should just be there, no questions asked. But then, our managers did that to us often when I worked in the restaurant industry. Mandatory meeting at 8am on a Saturday or Sunday morning, even for the people who closed and didn't leave till 2am the night before.
    via u/kikazztknmz
  • teenagesadist • 13h ago . Just expect it to get worse and worse.
    via u/teenagesadist
  • bwill1200 16h ago I'm trying to figure out what the heck a massage parlor needs a 2-hour meeting to explain that isn't an email?
    via u/bwill1200
  • BethJ2018 · 18h ago . "You seem to be under the impression I'm asking for time off. I'm informing you I'm exercising my right to use some of my PTO on this day at this time. You have had sufficient advance notice. I appreciate your cooperation. in this matter."
    via u/BethJ2018
  • whats_a_bylaw • 15h ago . I walked off a job because of that. I requested a day off 6 months in advance and the boss revoked it the week before. This was retail and not a big deal. I just left. In retrospect, it worked out, because we ended up moving across the country for better jobs 3 weeks later.
    via u/whats_a_bylaw
  • PhoenixApok OP • 14h ago I mean I've threatened to quit. Got approval from the hiring manager before I even started the job for a vacation 4 months later. Schedule for that week comes out and I have all but one day off. Says he can't give me that one.
    via u/PhoenixApok
  • Told him I didnt know what to tell him. My cruise left that day so I definitely wouldnt be there. Ball was in his court. To be fair he knew I wanted time off but not for what.
    via u/PhoenixApok
  • KateKoffing ⚫ 15h ago Companies need to learn that loyalty is a two way street
    via u/KateKoffing
  • Tatoes91 13h ago Loyalty requires a living wage.
    via u/Tatoes91
  • madsjchic 12h ago • If they require months advance notice for asking off...then they should be giving months advance notice for these oddball mandatory hours...
    via u/madsjchic
  • FH2actual • 3h ago Man I would have just bounced. No company deserves absolute loyalty. None of them show that kind of loyalty back to the employees. Its a two way street. I understand not being able to quit and I happily agree with reducing the f S given and effort put in after that. And I would still have started to look elsewhere immediately.
    via u/FH2actual
  • Public_Road_6426 • 1h ago If a meeting is mandatory, then it should be held during normal work hours, not after. Period. They show no loyalty to you, yet demand it from you for them? H I no.
    via u/Public_Road_6426
  • HotIndependence3... • 13h ago "example of loyalty"!? "What will other people think?" They will think that you're not a complete effing a h le boss and that OP loves their partner
    via u/HotIndependence365
  • Tinelahaneni · 7h ago Guess loyalty doesn't come with cake or presents then
    via u/Tinelahaneni

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boss antiwork workplace-stories massage parlor toxic-workplace job bosses work coworkers working reddit story toxic-boss workplace reddit thread bad bosses Reddit toxic-work-environment
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